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Tuesday 22 December 2015

Eulogy for Newer Fish


It is with a heavy heart and light kidneys, that I announce the demise of Newer Fish. I know that, for those of you who were close to him, this is not the news you wanted to hear, especially at this time of the year. In the short time that he was with us at pre-school, I know many of you grew very close to our scaly friend, and cod only knows, we'll miss him.
Newer Fish, it would seem, had been eel for some time. What started out as a slight haddock, quickly developed into full blown rigor mortis. But even then, he didn't carp about it. He quietly slipped away, to that great fish tank in the sky, and we can all take comfort from knowing he has gone to a better plaice.
We will remember Newer Fish fondly- a little ray of sunshine, a happy sole, never koi, who always had time to listen (even though he was hard of herring), who was always a dab hand at cheering us up.
And let us not forget his generosity- how often he contributed to the social fund, to the tuna six squid. He was not one to let his friends flounder, always there with a comforting word and sound advice.
I'll leave you to mullet over, knowing that, when we all shufflle off to that great aquarium in the sky, whale meet again. My friends, I give you Newer Fish.